Valentines Day is here again and retailers are happy for it. It’s guilt time, when 364 days of neglect can be ignored through the showering of affection, gifts and a nice night out. But is this what you want?
Two videos below demonstrate the text…
For me, Valentines day is everyday. Because I’ve been married a few times and know the cost of ignorance for 364 days and apologies on valentines day. In fact i was once dating two people and had to perform two valentines day’s on one day. And that’s another story of learning from experience.
When I ask people “do you want a long term life long marriage, the answer is usually YES.” An unequivocal YES. But then if I observe their behaviour for just a few days, it becomes obvious that they are accidentally not walking the talk. Worry about money takes precedence. Talking about home renovation takes priority. Stress wins over romance and most damaging, is the counter intuitive loss of a hold on individuality.
So, for most people, the video below demonstrates exactly how, relationships suddenly fail. They are just looking at the wrong things.
So, what should we be using as a fair approximation to guide us to sustainable, long term, for life relationships?
1. Make Valentines Day Every Day
2. Be a more independent powerful version of you than when you met (avoid the too much WE syndrome)
3. Make love a lifestyle. Fall in love 1,000 times a day with everything from people to flowers. The Zen of Sex
4. Make 33% of your future’s compatible and isolate the rest.
5. Make your emotions work for you. You started off infatuated with them (more positives than negatives) but will soon find equal positive and negatives, which kills romance and libido. Instead, see balance but simply focus on the positives.
6. Substitute big sex with little sex. A touch on the hand, a kiss on the shoulder, a smile for recognition, a gift for no reason, a small act of ignoring a fault. Micro sex is as great as macro. Nothing is ever missing.
7. Be alone sometimes. Nothing beats “me time” to refresh the heart and soul. Especially if, in those times, you can sink into the bean bag of soul. Usually at peace in nature does it.
Happy Valentines, today, tomorrow and for the rest of your days.
Chris.
Here’s a little video From Kerry Ann Midday Show….