The Dual Nature of Pride: Embracing Authenticity and Professionalism

Chris discusses the concept of pride and its dual nature, emphasizing the importance of self-pride for personal defense and conscious living. He warns against the dangers of associating one’s identity too closely with a public persona, which can lead to post-performance depression. Chris introduces the idea of playing characters, such as “Chris the Transition Man,” on stage to separate the public performance from personal identity. He highlights the necessity for everyone in business to adopt a professional on-screen persona and warns against the complacency of presenting oneself lazily. Ultimately, he encourages embracing different roles in various contexts while maintaining a strong connection to one’s core self.

Listen to the Audio Here

Introduction

Good morning, good afternoon, wherever you are. This is Chris, and today we’re going to talk about pride. Pride is often seen negatively, diminished and denounced for its role in wicked human behavior, as highlighted in religious contexts. However, today I want to discuss the good side of pride and advocate for it.

The Complexity of Pride

When we say, “I’m proud of you,” or “I’m proud of my kids,” we use a language that implies we feel good about someone else’s behavior, potentially stealing their joy. Just as we shouldn’t steal someone else’s sadness, we shouldn’t claim their joy. This creates a complex situation where we commend others’ efforts while attaching our own sense of pride to their achievements.

Recognizing others’ achievements and respecting their efforts is beautiful, but there’s a fine line between genuine recognition and attaching our own identity to their success. When we say, “I’m really proud of you,” we must ensure it acknowledges their work, not our ego.

Self-Pride and Conscious Living

If you’re not proud of who you are, there’s a problem. Pride means you can defend what you do and who you are. For example, I’m proud to be Chris. I’m proud to live on purpose, teach the laws of nature, care about the planet, be kind to people and their animals, and live consciously. This self-pride is about respecting and defending our deliberate actions and their impacts on the world.

Thoughts, like wireless signals, travel through walls, unseen but impactful. Our thoughts, even the private angry or worried ones, communicate and affect others. It’s likely that before the end of our lifetimes, we will discover that the unseen presence of wireless signals contributes to health issues, much like how the older generation’s exposure to toxins gave them immunity to certain modern-day threats.

The Harm of Shame

Pride is a good vibe, a way to respect and defend our actions. In contrast, shame is harmful. It transmits negative energy, not only diminishing us but also affecting those around us. There is no value in shaming ourselves, as it only propagates more shame. Instead, we should acknowledge when we slip from our standards without beating ourselves up. Recognizing our human flaws and being proud of our awareness and efforts to improve is more productive.

Deliberate Living

Being proud means consciously enacting good deeds, complimenting people, making thoughtful purchases, and being kind. This deliberateness in our actions aligns with the principles of Zen and inner wealth: “I need nothing, I want nothing, I have everything.” Loving who we are, even with our imperfections, is crucial. Constantly striving for unattainable perfection only ingrains shame and diminishes self-respect.

Balancing Expectations and Reality

Unrealistic expectations cause suffering. The Buddha said, “All suffering is caused by desire,” but it’s our expectations that truly block our love and cause pain. Fake parenting, where parents hide their true selves or exhibit extremes, creates false expectations in children. Understanding the universal laws of nature, such as the law of balance, helps us accept both the good and bad within ourselves.

The Role of Professionalism

When I travel as a professional speaker, I often play characters like “Chris the Transition Man” or “the anti-guru guru.” These characters allow me to perform on stage without sinking into a diametric opposite offstage. Everyone in business today is a professional speaker, constantly on camera and observed. It’s crucial to separate our on-screen persona from our true self to avoid the negative effects of over-identifying with our roles.

Conclusion

Understanding pride’s dual nature helps us embrace authenticity while maintaining professionalism. By being conscious of our actions, respecting our achievements, and acknowledging our flaws, we can cultivate healthy self-pride. Separating our public persona from our true self prevents post-performance depression and ensures we live authentically. Let’s strive to balance our expectations, live deliberately, and be proud of who we are without falling into the traps of shame or narcissism.

This blog post provides a comprehensive overview of the complexities of pride and its impact on personal and professional life. By understanding and balancing pride, we can lead more authentic and fulfilling lives.

 

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